So, I'm now officially the wrong side of 29. On Sunday afternoon my best friend phoned me to ask "are you suicidal yet?", and I was little unhappy in a "what have I done with my life" way. Luckily by the time I woke up on Monday, the mood had passed and I had a lovely day. It was super sunny, so, as befits a librarian of my age, Mr L & I took a stroll around the local park (where I saw an obscene amount of duck sex. Ducks! Get a room!) and then went for lunch.
As we were waiting for our food, the couple at the table next to us were just leaving. The lady rose from her chair accompanied by the "oofs" and "ooohs" that accompany us over 30s every time we do anything more strenuous than drinking a cup of tea. When she'd got to her feet, she turned to us and said "You never think you're going to get old. I don't think I'm much longer for this world". What are you supposed to say to that?
And is this what you get when you reach your thirties, no more strippers* for your birthday just a Pensioner-o-Gram who comes to tell you of the 'joys' ahead of you?
*Although I've never been sent a stripper. And that's they way I like it, thanks.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
The dog ate my homework
Ooooh, you'll never guess what happened! Well, there I was flying back to LA from Sydney when the plane only went and crashed! No? Yes! So then, I was all stranded on this island with these other damn annoying people and would you believe it - in this weird underground house thing, there was a computer! "Great" I thought, and there I was all set to update my blog but apparantly someone blogging about 4, 8, 15, 16, 23 and 42 was more important and so it's been three months since I last wrote here.
Oh, alright. I have not been living in Lost since December (not even the faux England bit where Charlie lives). I'm just lazy.
Here are ten things that have happened since I last blogged.
1. I got a whole lot closer to 30. Boo!
2. I booked a holiday with my best friend in Tunisia - we are off on April 1st to drink for a week in the sun and forget all about the fact that we are both 30. I booked it All Inclusive and she doesn't know. The reason I decided to book All Inclusive wasn't down to the unlimited booze, or use of pedalos, but the fact that you get Afternoon Tea and Biscuits every day. Rock.
3. I gave 20p to a woman with no change who needed to use the loo at Charing Cross Station. This means that I have repaid the 20p a lady gave to me almost two years ago when I was desperate at Victoria Station and had no change. I had been waiting all that time for someone to help. Karma.
4. The library was broken into and some hoodlum stole 12 computers. Double boo!
5. I signed up for a librarians conference in April 'cus Miss S is going too, only to be told by a publishers rep I know that the kind of people that go to this conference are "hardcore drinkers" and "party until 5am". There is a disco every night. Both Miss S and I will be taking cameras, I think this has to be seen to be believed.
6. I attended a course at my old university and saw one of my old tutors. She didn't recognise me as the drunken idiot who stood on her handbag in the pub at the christmas 'do'.
7. I had my hair cut and immediately wished I hadn't.
8. I realised that I really like singing along to songs that have the word "goddamn" in them.
9. I went to the theatre in Manchester and a man was sick on me during the interval. This is what happens when you attend a cultural event in the north of this country.
10. I got a even closer to 30. Boo!
So see, apart from the burlgary and vomiting incidences, you didn't really miss much, did you?
Oh, alright. I have not been living in Lost since December (not even the faux England bit where Charlie lives). I'm just lazy.
Here are ten things that have happened since I last blogged.
1. I got a whole lot closer to 30. Boo!
2. I booked a holiday with my best friend in Tunisia - we are off on April 1st to drink for a week in the sun and forget all about the fact that we are both 30. I booked it All Inclusive and she doesn't know. The reason I decided to book All Inclusive wasn't down to the unlimited booze, or use of pedalos, but the fact that you get Afternoon Tea and Biscuits every day. Rock.
3. I gave 20p to a woman with no change who needed to use the loo at Charing Cross Station. This means that I have repaid the 20p a lady gave to me almost two years ago when I was desperate at Victoria Station and had no change. I had been waiting all that time for someone to help. Karma.
4. The library was broken into and some hoodlum stole 12 computers. Double boo!
5. I signed up for a librarians conference in April 'cus Miss S is going too, only to be told by a publishers rep I know that the kind of people that go to this conference are "hardcore drinkers" and "party until 5am". There is a disco every night. Both Miss S and I will be taking cameras, I think this has to be seen to be believed.
6. I attended a course at my old university and saw one of my old tutors. She didn't recognise me as the drunken idiot who stood on her handbag in the pub at the christmas 'do'.
7. I had my hair cut and immediately wished I hadn't.
8. I realised that I really like singing along to songs that have the word "goddamn" in them.
9. I went to the theatre in Manchester and a man was sick on me during the interval. This is what happens when you attend a cultural event in the north of this country.
10. I got a even closer to 30. Boo!
So see, apart from the burlgary and vomiting incidences, you didn't really miss much, did you?
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