Shut up!

I went home for the weekend, and these are the conversations I overheard and wished I hadn't.

1. On the train home I got to sit in First Class for no extra as the train was full and so they 'declassified' a first class carriage to let the general public use it. The train manager made an announcement to say 'if you don't have a reservation go to coach G'. Therefore carriage G was full of people who had brought tickets that didn't have reserved seats, and yet there were these two woman who were having this conversation when I got on the train, and when I got off it an hour and a half later:

Woman 1: Well, I shan't move when they ask us too, 'cus there aren't any seats, it's a disgrace.
Woman 2: Yes, and they can't make us move, and we shan't move, shall we?
Woman 1: Well, how will they make us move? They can't make us move. How many seats are on this train? 1000? And they're all full.
Woman 2: Well, we'll just stay here, we won't move, they can't make us. It's a disgrace.

Although they did venture off onto this subject for about 10 minutes when the drinks trolley came round:

Woman 1: £3.50 for a Gin and Tonic?
Woman 2: It's a disgrace.

2. On the train back, despite having my super earphones in that usually block out background noise, I managed to overhear a boy having this conversation. With every bleedin' person in his mobile phone address book. For three hours:

Boy: I went on a blind date with two girls on Friday, Girl Number One was alright, but I liked Girl Number Two, and then Girl Number One got really funny, so I told her to go home so I could stay out with Girl Number Two.
What a charmer!

And my favourite excuse that was given for late running trains, which were quite clearly to blame on over-running engineering works (clue: we could see the engineers from the train window) ? That old British standard - after two whole days of warm weather, the tracks were suffering from 'heat exhaustion'.